Hey! Its been a little while since i talked on here so i'm gonna do that now by saying its the 3rd anniversary of me publicly coming out as trans/genderfluid. I know it doesn't sound like a big deal to a lot of people, aside from being trans the only real qualifier for something like this is just existing for a while, but that's why this is so important to me. I vividly remember the day i came out, the 31st of january 2021, as being one of the most nerve wracking days of my entire life.

I was terrified of how people i knew saw me, how people i didn't know would treat me if they found out, how i was even going to live my life the way i wanted. It was a lot of stuff on 15 year old me's mind, even ignoring the numerous other mental problems i had at the time, and the fact that i'm here right now shows that i made it at least in one regard. I wasn't even expecting to make it a year after i came out, let alone 3!

I'm a ways away from who i intend to be and how i intend to live but comparing the me writing this to the original me that was terrified to bring up these feelings at all, fae would've been ecstatic to see me in the position i'm in now. fae would've thought it was rad that i made irl trans friends, that i finally settled on a name i loved (after close to 2 years of deliberation), that people in real life are starting to recognize me for who i am and not what other people said i was, just who i am now would've awestruck me back then.

The road to who i am has been tough and long, that the road that i'm on is only gonna get tougher and longer from here, but when i think back to who i was and and think forward to who i want to be, it makes it all worth it. Thanks for reading all this, stay safe <3

2023 had a lot of ups and downs for me but overall, i’m really happy with how i’m ending it.

My artistic output has improved dramatically, i’ve had a lot less personal issues, i’ve been a lot more motivated to work on projects and finding ones that i genuinely care about, i’ve gotten out of my comfort zone a lot more, i’m less prone to throwing myself into random drama, i’ve fallen in love with tons of movies and tv shows and albums that have influenced what i want to make and when i’ve ran into issues, i’m a lot better at actually fixing them. I’m not gonna pretend that it was all fun and games (because it wasn’t) but for the first time, this year i’ve really felt in control of my life and it has me looking into my problems and figuring out solutions instead of just letting them fester until i have a nervous breakdown.

Moving onto resolutions, my only real goal for this year is to work on as many cool projects as i can and share them with the people i love. Fame and money would be cool too but i’m not gonna beat myself up if i don’t get them because they’re not what’s important to me anymore. Im going into 2024 optimistically. i know ill probably get thrown a few curveballs and it wont always be good but im fine with that. I’m just gonna hope for the best, deal with the worst and try to stay afloat the best i can. <3

(p.s. heres the last thing i drew in 2023 lol)

I feel bad for not posting any of my art here this year. NG probably on par w Tumblr as the friendliest place for me to post my stuff in terms of organization (its worse in terms of engagement and likes but its not like those dictate a lot of what i make anyways so). I'm gonna start by posting a few of my fav pieces from this year and try and keep it consistent from there. Maybe i'll even make and post a few animations depending on how things go, who knows :3

Also i redesigned my sona again for the billionth time. Fae look like this now (chibi proportions notwithstanding)